Thirty! It’s magnificent age; that spot on the graph when you really should be hitting your stride. You’re old enough to have put (most) foolish things aside, and your emotional, financial, professional and physical peaks are starting to coincide.
Well, hopefully. Because, while you may physically be at your strongest around the age of 30, it’s also the time when the wheels can start to fall off. A natural decrease in physical activity can slow your metabolism, while declining testosterone and minor niggles conspire to make the damage less-recoverable.
That’s why it’s the perfect time to give your body a swift MOT, and make sure you’re in good shape for the upcoming decades. Below, we’ve whipped up a definitive physical check-list. If you can’t manage any of it, work out why, and take the steps to fix it. You’ll thank us when you’re 40.
Can you handle the 'Chair Of Death’?
It’s basic — but essential. Stand facing a typical kitchen chair, with your toes underneath the seat. Now, ‘sit’ down and back into a squat, keeping your chest up and back straight.
Can you hit ‘parallel’ – the point where your hip-crease goes below your knee – without your knees hitting the chair? If not, it’s because your glutes have been lulled into inactivity by years of sitting: wake them up with the ‘Fire hydrant’, and add some glute bridges to your gym routine.
Do you sleep with one pillow?
Be honest, how many are you propping yourself up on? If it’s two – or more – it might be a sign that you’re dealing with some kyphosis – excessive curvature of the spine causing a hunching of the back, possibly linked to all the time you spend on your laptop.
A physical therapist will be able to help, but for the time being set a timer on your phone to ping you every thirty minutes, and use the reminder to stand up, take a couple of deep breaths, and fix your posture before you sit down again.
Can you run 5K in under 30 minutes?
You don’t have to be a cardio machine, but having a decent baseline of cardiovascular fitness is protective against a whole slew of diseases – as well as aiding concentration, brain function and mood.
The ill-effects of running on your knees have been hugely overstated, but if pounding pavement doesn’t appeal – or you aren’t built for it – the rower offers an impact-free, upper-body-inclusive alternative.
Can you balance on one leg (with one eye shut)?
Try it now: stand on one leg, close your eyes, and count to ten, slowly. Wait, did you fall over? That’s probably a symptom of another injury or imbalance you’ve never quite addressed – a lack of core strength, or even something more serious, like nerve damage or an inner ear disorder.
If a bit of basic strength training (and practice) doesn’t fix it, consider getting it checked out.
Can you do ten proper press-ups?
So few? Yes, but we’re talking strict: chest to the floor at the bottom of the movement, arms straight at the top, and a body straight as a board at every stage in between. It’s a fundamental test of core and upper-body strength, and as good an indicator as any that you’re maintaining the muscle and bone density you’ll want to shepherd into your later years.
If you can’t manage this many, chop your current best total in half, and do that number every minute for ten minutes. When that feels easy, add one each round.
Can you carry another human?
It’s fine if they’re slightly smaller than you: laudable if they’re larger. The ‘loaded carry’ is the missing link in many people’s fitness regimes, despite being one of the most fundamental of human movements (the others, since you ask, are pushing, pulling, hip-hinging, squatting and lunging).
Ideally, you’d be able to carry someone in the classic over-the-threshold position as well as over (or on) your shoulders: if you haven’t got a willing volunteer, a slightly-lighter sandbag or medicine ball will work for practice.
Can you 'broad jump' your own height?
The box jump – beloved of CrossFit devotees though it may be – is often a circus trick, more representative of extreme hip flexibility than explosive strength, and also an easy way to scrape a shin.
‘Broad jump’ instead: from a standing start, take off and land on both feet together, aiming for distance and landing softly. While we’re on, you should also be able to vault a medium-sized gate: the Parkourist’s ‘lazy vault’ is your friend here.
Can you get up from the floor, with minimal difficulty?
By ‘minimal’, we really mean ‘Without using your hands or knees.’ In a study of more than 2,000 ageing people, those best able to manage it had a lower incidence of all-cause mortality than less physically capable volunteers.
Assuming you can do this without difficult, spice it up by holding a weight plate in front of you – you’ll need new reserves of hip mobility and inventiveness to get up unaided.
Want more ways to wind back the years? Here’s a gentleman’s guide to breathwork…
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